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Queen Helter of Skelter


I am amazingness incarnate. I exist only to rule the Kingdom of Spectaculosity and to make the world a totally magnificent place. Basking in the glow of my sheer fabulousness has been known to cause random implosions, nosebleeds and fainting. Do not bask on an empty stomach or while operating heavy machinery.

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To find a list of all my OuaT stories, just click here:

OUAT MASTERPOST

To find a list of all my Fallout stories, just click here:

FALLOUT MASTERPOST

To find a list of all my Maleficent stories, just click here:

MALEFICENT MASTERPOST

To find a list of my publications, click here:

STORIES BY CRYSTAL LYNN HILBERT

To read my (free!) novellas:

DEAD ON ARRIVAL

THE TRICKSTER EDDA

Ask me anything

The Many-Named

cyprith:

A story about a differently gendered Norse hero raised from the dead and sent to save the world. Involves talking wolves, monstrous women and dragons. One of my favorite things I’ve done.

The Many-Named

After a hundred years—after more and after less—she wakes. Her hands are women’s hands, but these hips have never held a child. Her thighs remember dragons, her feet foreign oceans. She does not know her name. She knows too many. Each bone sings the telling of a different war.

For some time, she cannot move.

(Read More)

twitch-the-tiny:

kingkeenanthegreat:

dash-of-dark:

JUST FUCKING LISTEN. 

THIS IS HALLOWEEN BUT NOT LIKE YOU KNOW IT

reblog so others can hear it!

Where the hell are the Victorian Goths they should be all over this.

*SMASHES REBLOG BUTTON*

(via moniquill)

BREAKING: Missouri State Senator Jamilah Nasheed has been arrested in Ferguson, on the 72nd day of protests.

thepoliticalfreakshow:

(via moniquill)

Soul of Soup Bones

cyprith:

A story about necromancy, cooking, and past lives.

Soul of Soup Bones

Finding Drevený came first. An unrecorded town on the border of Slovakia—outgrown, emptied and overgrown since 1523—it knew no maps. Adrienne located its remnants just the same; wild roses, a crust of scattered masonry in a pitted field, bomb-broken from an old war.

The necromancer’s journal placed the forest less than a mile to the north. She found it near enough as he described, downhill a way and settled in a loose crook of the river.

From there, with only the ritual to worry about, things grew easier.

(Read More)

(via cyprith)

mumblingsage:

I’d bet a lot of money and all extant copies of my own juvenalia (moderate sentimental value) that the most common verbs in early first drafts are:

1. to be

2. to turn

3. to look

and a distant 4. to (just) stand (there)

So I shouldn’t start my next story with “She was turning to look when she saw someone just standing there”? 

invisiblelad:

lovelyandbrown:

thisiseverydayracism:

The prison-industrial complex is just a myth…right?

Jesus he didn’t even have us do the damn math. He just said it.

…yeah. I suppose there’s no point in finding flowery rhetoric for it. “Putting people in jail is good for business” is pretty much the size of it. 

Free ghost story!

Looking for a neat semi-romantic ghost story for Halloween? Try Dead on Arrival. Previously published with Eggplant Press (since closed), Dead on Arrival is now free on Smashwords.

Dead on Arrival

Max is dead. Cut himself shaving and now look at him. A ghost in his old apartment, Max is stuck haunting the new tenant, a girl named Charlie. And while Charlie can see him, well… she’s not the most cheerful of girls on the best of days, and she’s certainly not thrilled to be sharing her apartment with a maudlin Irish ghost.

Life—or un-life, as the case may be—is about to become difficult.

Dead on Arrival

Sort of a romance. Sort of dysfunctional. Sort of figuring-out-how-to-live-in-the-word-when-you’re-not-living. Also kind of sweet, and very free.

Give it a try!