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Queen Helter of Skelter


I am amazingness incarnate. I exist only to rule the Kingdom of Spectaculosity and to make the world a totally magnificent place. Basking in the glow of my sheer fabulousness has been known to cause random implosions, nosebleeds and fainting. Do not bask on an empty stomach or while operating heavy machinery.

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To find a list of all my OuaT stories, just click here:

OUAT MASTERPOST

To find a list of all my Fallout stories, just click here:

FALLOUT MASTERPOST

To find a list of my publications, click here:

STORIES BY CRYSTAL LYNN HILBERT

To buy my novella, click here:

DEAD ON ARRIVAL

Ask me anything

Whatever’s Said

Anon prompted: It’s supposed to be different

Follows directly after Seize.

Whatever’s Said

They don’t travel much farther. Sunny’s exhausted and Butch is so damn pissed he can’t see straight. Sun’s getting low anyway. When he sees the side of an old farmhouse in the distance, he heads straight for it without a word, his best girl leaning on his arm.

Charon can go fuck himself.

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Vaquero

Anon prompted: Old world lover

(Don’t forget to keep prompting, guys! Five words or less.)

Vaquero

For the first couple of days, he keeps expecting her to follow him. Keeps expecting he’ll open the door one morning to find her there, yelling or smiling. Either one will lead to a fight, another argument and fists clenched so tight the skin of his knuckles will split even without him hitting anything. He stalks around the place like a mean old cat, knocking things off shelves for the hell of it, picking fights with his own ghosts. Waiting.

But Marilyn doesn’t follow him.

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Seize

alonelyscapula: “Major Catastrophe, reporting for duty.”

Seize

They’ve been waking for about a million years, so yeah, they’re not exactly paying attention when they stumble headfirst into a molerat den. No big deal, though. Between him and Big Red, they waste ‘em pretty quick.

No, the thing is, Sunny doesn’t even move. Doesn’t lift her gun. Doesn’t do nothing.

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Where One Finds Family

vivacioustavernwench prompted: Ode to my family

I don’t know why I ship it, but I do.

Where One Finds Family

When people start shouting outside his tent, Arcade ignores it. Commotion at Old Mormon Fort is nothing new. He just hopes this particular commotion doesn’t involve a grinning metal abomination capable of accessing any electronic system in Vegas.

Not that Yes Man—wait, sorry—not that Fredrick Walker bothers him, exactly. It’s just that Arcade sort of has a personal history with artificially intelligent overlords in positions of vast and unmitigated power.

You know, little stuff.  

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Absence

alysetoahouse: The old saying goes

Masterpost here.

Absence

Without Raul around, Boone isn’t really sure what to do with himself when he can’t sleep.

Bad nights before, the old man was always up and puttering around with something. Sometimes they talked. Most times they didn’t. There’s a kind of comfort in cleaning your guns next to somebody else, your demons elbow to elbow and sharing space at the bar. Raul understood that.

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benjibreak:

nnnnight on the town in a new dress aw yis

bonus:


it’s too late for that raul everyone is already swooning over that bow tie

bullwhipsandnecrosis asked: Rip my heart out will ya! You took that bitty prompt to a different direction than I would've imagined when writing it, and I liked that and oh, it was a lovely read.

I have a gigantic soft-spot in my heart for Carla. She doesn’t get enough love.

Peace

bullwhipsandnecrosis: I really need to pee

Keep prompting, guys! Five words or less. Just hit up my ask.

Peace

It’s just starting to get cooler at night and finally, finally, Carla can almost see the reason Craig has it so damn bad for Novac.

It’s… cute, in a way. Private. Vegas had its privacy in anonymity. With so many people and so much to see, unless you went out with sequins on your god givens, no one spared you a second glance.

Here, though, Novac buys its privacy in solitude. At first, the quiet drove her crazy. Nothing to do, day after day. No stories flying through the streets. No joy or scandal or sorrow. She thought she’d lose her mind. But there’s something to be said for peace.

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Five Word Fallout Prompts: Keep Prompting!

My askbox is open for Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas prompts.

There’s just one catch: all prompts must be 5 words or under.

That’s it. That’s my only rule. Leave your prompts is my ask; anything you want, as often as you want, so long as it’s 5 or under.

Keep prompting, guys! I like to have a bunch of prompts in my box to choose from. (And seeing the little note icon always makes my day.) Come play! Come play!

(Masterpost of Fills Here)

Some anon just left a fucking gorgeous prompt in my ask. THANK YOU, BEAUTIFUL PERSON.